Thats Not Fair!

I was sitting in the lobby at the ob/gyn clinic. Looking around, people watching. Wondering what everyone’s story was. Why was she there? Why were they there? A young Asian couple came from the doors. Maybe early 20s. Young and cute. Happily smiling and whispering together as they walked by. She had her left arm slung through his bent right arm like he was courting her. Immediately I assumed are she was pregnant, but not very far along; I couldn’t see much a belly.

It interests me. The stories all these people have- but especially them. Was it their first appointment and the pregnancy was just confirmed? And that’s why they were so happy? But maybe not…. maybe she wasn’t even pregnant and they were so happy because the STD test came bak negative lol. The only time I was ever that happy leaving an ob/gyn clinic was for that reason.

Anyway, it was my turn to see the doctor. The nurse called me back, and about 45 minutes later I left in  different spirits then that young happy couple. Instead, I left sobbing and in tears.  I had just been told I had a cyst the size of two computer mice on my ovary and needed surgery that following Monday. Cyst removal with the possibility of having an ovary removed as well. Well the possibility turned ino reality when the cysyt, ovary and fallopian tube all came out.

Was I crying that day because the chance of me ever becoming pregnant was even lower than it had been? Or was I crying because I was thinking “What next? What else is gonna go wrong?” Maybe a little of both. Either way, I know the tears aren’t done forever.

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